School 10

Toni Soderholm

June 3, 1943 ~ September 6, 2023 (age 80) 80 Years Old


Antoinette (Toni) Gertrude Soderholm, 80, passed away peacefully on September 6, 2023 at Carriage Green in Milford, CT. Toni was born on June 3, 1943 in Queens, NY to the late William and Charlotte Scheel. She was the beloved wife of the late Kai Erik Soderholm, with whom she joins in the afterlife.

As a young woman she did very well in school, and completed high school one year early, before moving on to Bellevue School of Nursing. She graduated in Bellevue School of Nursing in 1963 and became a pediatric nurse, due to her love of children. After this, she took further classes in NYU and also worked at William Paterson and Passaic County Community Colleges teaching other nurses. During this time, in 1965, she met Kai Soderholm, and they got married in June of 1966. Together they chose to move to a house in the woods in Stockholm, NJ in 1971, and had two children in the following two years.

Toni was a devoted mom, primarily staying home until both of her children started school. Then she became a school nurse at Lafayette Township School. Soon afterwards, she became a camp nurse at Silver Lake YMCA, giving her children the opportunity to enjoy full summers at this wonderful overnight camp. Toni was an incredibly caring mom throughout, with tremendous positive energy, openly encouraging her children to be the people they wanted to be. During these years, in addition to her work, she also helped other children in many ways, like volunteering as a school board member and a soccer coach.

Around 1995, Toni became a member of the Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Sussex County (UUFSC), a church that fit her open-minded caring mindset, and continued her frequent volunteerism. After retiring in 2004, she traveled to dozens of countries and cruised the world with her husband and friends, passing through the arctic circle, equator and around Cape Horn on their many journeys. She also continued with UUFSC and frequently volunteered. In 2010 she was determined to be the Senior of the Year by a Knights of Columbus council, and in 2012 was determined to be one of the 12 Outstanding Senior Citizens of Sussex County at the New Jersey State fair.

Toni is survived by her son, Karl Erik Soderholm, and his wife, Lori; her daughter, Heidi Charlene Hashagen, and her husband, Carl; and her brother Leo Feher. As well as her grandchildren: Willow, Elizabeth and River Soderholm. She is also survived by many other additional family and friends. In addition to her beloved husband, Kai, she was preceded in death by her brother, Thomas Feher.

Toni’s passing leaves a void in the hearts of all who knew her, but her legacy of love and laughter will forever shine as a beacon of inspiration. She will be deeply missed and lovingly remembered by her family and friends. In lieu of flowers, the family kindly requests donations to the Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Sussex County ( or the Unitarian Society of New Haven ( in Toni's memory.

May she rest in eternal peace, reunited with her loved ones who went before her, and may her memory continue to bring comfort to those who cherished her.

A Graveside Service will take place on Saturday September 16, 2023 at Kings Highway Cemetery (271 Cherry St, Milford, CT 06460) for 10 a.m. A Memorial Service to celebrate Toni's life (and the life of her husband Kai) will also occur at 11 a.m. at Trinity Lutheran Church, 21 Robert Treat Pkwy, Milford, CT 06460 with a reception afterward. The memorial service will also be available online through zoom on the Trinity Lutheran Church website. (

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Graveside Service
September 16, 2023

10:00 AM
Kings Highway Cemetery
271 Cherry Street
Milford, CT 06460

Memorial Service
September 16, 2023

11:00 AM
Trinity Lutheran Church of Milford
21 Robert Treat Pkwy
Milford, CT 06460


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